For the Love of Lourdes

God, I love her, I love her so much

But I’m afraid this love is one I cannot touch

My love burns for her

My body yearns for her

But I must stay away

For how long? Who knows?

Maybe until my dying day

My love for her grows

But fear I do not show

Fear I do not feel

This love, this pain, is surreal

This love, it mustn’t be

God, I’m on bended knee

Begging, asking, God, fix this please!

I miss her so much

I long for her touch

To see her beautiful face

To feel her warm embrace

Should I try to move on?

I’ve got to be strong

It’s only her love that I want to know

But, with every second the pain grows

Maybe one day, we will be together again

Until then, it will never end

This pain I feel

So real

So strong

So long…

Panic

Panic, Panic, Everywhere

Panic, Panic, Pull out my hair

Panic, Panic, All Around,

Panic, Panic, What’s That Sound?

Panic, Panic, In My Head

Panic, Panic, Go Take My Meds

Panic, Panic, In My Head

Panic, Panic, Go Back To Bed

Panic, Panic, All Alone

Panic, Panic, No One Knows

Panic, Panic, Go Lie Down

Panic, Panic, Stay Away From Town

Panic, Panic, Full Of Fear

Panic, Panic, Just Stay Here

Panic, Panic, It Grows and Grows

Panic, Panic, Don’t Let It Show

Interview Hopes

I had a job interview today

I know I won’t get it

But still I hope

I still pray

I have nothing left

Nothing to hope for

Nothing to live for

Just nothing

Pull myself up by my boot straps

Put on my big boy underwear

Wash the sand out of my pussy

This is just life, another one of life’s craps

Two break-ups in just a few months

Both women were my whole world, if only for that moment

One relationship was several years

The other just a handful of weeks

And now, I have to deal with the pandemic, you know, Covid-19

Self-Care is important right now

But why? What is the point?

I feel butchered inside

Just like a cow

This too shall pass

Even if I have to kick myself in the ass

Just keep my head up

Don’t give life the shaft

I’m Sorry I’m Not Perfect

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, No matter how hard I try

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, Sometimes I just cry

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, Sometimes I get mad

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, Sometimes I get sad

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, Or the man you really need

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, When we do “The Deed”

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, It tears me up inside

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, Maybe I should die

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, I don’t mean to scream and yell

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, And told you “Go to Hell”

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, Maybe I should go

I’m sorry I’m not perfect, But I love you more than you know

If You Looked Out God’s Window

If you looked out God’s window, I wonder what you’d see

A flower in the open field, perhaps a honey bee?

Maybe it would be a heart full of sorrow,

And perhaps one full of glee

If you looked out God’s window, I wonder what you’d see

A group of Angels in the clouds dancing gleefully?

If you looked out God’s window, I wonder what you’d see

Would you see the moon and stars, perhaps the sun for all eternity?

Would it be a sunrise, or a child that flies a kite?

Would it be a sunset, or a love-struck couple that just met?

Would it be a mother’s tear, because she just heard of her worst fear?

Would it be a father’s sigh, wondering how he will survive?

If you looked out God’s window, I wonder what you’d see

All that you created

All that is

All that was

All that will ever be

The Hibbidy Dibbidy

Doin’ the Hibbidy Dibbidy

Girl, bounce on my Bippity

Doin’ the Hibbidy Dibbidy

All sorts of Majiggery

Saturday night Shenanigans

Turns into to Sunday pew hangovers

“Never doing that again”,

“A new leaf I’ve turned over”

Doin’ the Hibbidy Dibbidy

Is that all we are?

Doin’ the Hibbidy Dibbidy

Fun in the back of my car

What do we have?

Is this real?

Is there a future here?

Or, are we just having fun,

Doin’ the Hibbidy Dibbidy?

So Much Rage

So much rage, So much rage
Don’t hurt anyone, just put words on the page
Just words on a page, get out all this rage

Heart beating faster
This feels like a disaster
So much rage, so much rage
Feels like it rattles my cage
So much rage, so much hate
Tear down that gate!

Where is it coming from? I don’t understand
Such a good mood this morning,
STOP! Make a stand!

So much rage, so much rage
Starting to feel ill
Make it all go away,
Go take “Happy Pills”

So much rage, gotta run
Should I load my…gun?
So much rage, so much rage
Don’t hurt anyone!

So much rage, so much rage
Just go to bed
Oh no, too late! A bullet to the head!